gender

There's a song that stole my heart and has been living in my head rent-free for the last few weeks. Before hearing it, the thought “enbies should pick their anthem” had never really occurred to me – but now I can't think of a better contender to that title than “The Code” by Nemo.

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(~3 min read)

i'm not “a female” / “a male” / “a they/them”

please, just call me by my gender! 🙄

callmebymygender.top

Sometimes it takes people a long time to figure out their gender and sexuality (and it's perfectly okay!) I was 27 when I came out as pansexual, and honestly it's not even that late. Still, it makes me feel sad about all time “wasted” not knowing who I am and being confused AF.

So today I'd like to take a moment to rant about three of the awful things that contributed to that.

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(~3 min read)

Polska gramatyka jest skomplikowana i silnie zgenderyzowana. Nie oznacza to jednak, że niemożliwe jest używanie innych form niż „on” i „ona”.

To narzędzie udostępnia linki do przykładów użycia (w prostych zdaniach oraz w literaturze, prasie, filmach i serialach) zaimków i innych form płciowych – nie tylko normatywnych „on” i „ona”, lecz także form niebinarnych.

Continue reading… zaimki.pl pronouns.page gitlab.com/Avris/Zaimki

We all have pronouns. They're those words that we use instead of calling someone by their name every time we mention them. Most people use “he/him” and “she/her”, so we automatically assume which one to call them based on someone's looks. But it's actually not that simple…

Gender is complicated. Some people “don't look like” their gender. Some prefer being called in a different way from what you'd assume. Some people don't fit into the boxes of “male” or “female” and prefer more neutral language.

This tool lets you share a link to your pronouns, with example sentences, so that you can show people how you like to be called.

zaimki.pl pronouns.page gitlab.com/Avris/Zaimki

I'm not kidding, everyone should have pronouns in their bio, if it's safe for them to do so. Yes, even if you're cis (= not trans). Yes, even if you're famous and everyone knows your gender already.

Here's why:

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(~2 min read)

Nie żartuję. Każdx, kto może bezpiecznie to zrobić, powininx mieć zaimki w bio. Tak, nawet jeśli jesteś cis (= nie trans). Tak, nawet jeśli jesteś sławnx i każdy już zna twoją płeć.

Oto dlaczego:

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(~3 min read)

Having lived in three different countries and interacted with people from all around the world made me realise that Polish names have some pretty unique quirks – to which, as a native speaker, I didn't give too much thought, while foreigners find them quite strange.

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(~4 min read)

For me, gender is over.

Not in a sad, “Game Over” way.

In a happy, “Mission accomplished” way.

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(~2 min read)
Tęczowa flaga Polski

Polszczyzna, jak każdy żywy język, nieustannie się zmienia i ewoluuje.

W kwestii inkluywności płciowej obserwujemy na przykład trend powrotu do używania feminatywów. I choć jest to świetne dla reprezentacji kobiet w przestrzeni publicznej, to do neutralnej płciowo polszczyzny jeszcze daleka droga.

Osobom niebinarnym ciężko jest się odnaleźć w binarnym do bólu języku polskim.

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(~10 min read)
A picture of myself

#IAmNonbinary is trending on Twitter. Next to beautiful pictures and inspiring stories of nonbinary folks, there’s also tons of hateful replies. Apart from the usual phobic comments, there’s also some idiotic requirements. Haters reproach people that they aren’t andogynous enough, or that they aren’t using “they/them” pronouns, etc, etc.

Oh for fuck’s sake. You’re missing the entire point.

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(~2 min read)

Toxic masculinity always has misogyny in it.

You can’t be scared shitless about seeming even just a bit feminine without secretly thinking that being a woman is somehow worse than being a man.

Diederik de Groot: Vind jij jezelf een ‘echte man’?

No such thing as a “real man”.

It’s just a social construct. It changes over time, it differs from country to country, from social group to social group. It’s super arbitrary.

All men are real men.

Restroom sign: Whatever, just wash your hands

At first I didn’t really think about it. It was yet another thing that my parents taught me and I just accepted. Boys and girls need to have separate toilets and locker rooms, so that the boys wouldn’t do nasty things to the girls. Simple.

But one day a cleaning lady came in to the boys’ locker room. And one day a female teacher come in. How come? Why can they see half-naked boys, while our female classmates cannot? That got me thinking and trying to find any sense in that.

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(~3 min read)

Being gay is not easy. Depending on where you live, it might mean different things to you. Best case scenario – some minor inconveniences. Worst case – even danger of death. LGBTQ youth has a higher suicide rate than their straight & cis friends, they fear getting disowned by their families, thrown out of their homes, in some countries being sentenced to prison or lashes... We don’t have equal rights, we can’t always show affection in public. Being gay can be scary, lonely and awful.

But there is also a good side to that. The side of being gay that I really really love!

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(~6 min read)