{"tag":"online dating","articles":{"blog\/society\/estimating-the-number-of-lgbtq-people":{"key":"blog\/society\/estimating-the-number-of-lgbtq-people","type":"article","published":true,"meta":{"createdAt":"2018-12-09T10:58:48+01:00","publishedAt":"2020-01-18T16:50:00+01:00","group":null,"category":"blog","subcategory":"society","slug":"estimating-the-number-of-lgbtq-people"},"content":{"en":{"slug":"estimating-the-number-of-lgbtq-people","title":"Estimating the number of LGBTQ people","intro":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_small.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022519.16083916084\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg 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data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_small.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022519.16083916084\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis post is not about gays. It\u0027s about maths.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","content":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_big.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022858\u0022 height=\u0022928\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022data:image\/png;base64,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\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_big.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022858\u0022 height=\u0022928\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis post is not about gays. It\u0027s about maths.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESome guy online told me that queers don\u0027t deserve rights (or at least the attention of lawmakers),\nbecause they make up only 0.03% of the population. Which is ridiculous.\nBoth the argumentation, and the number itself. Human rights are inherent and inviolable,\nhuman dignity doesn\u0027t depend on numbers of specific minoritiesed groups.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut it shows how important it is to properly estimate how many queer people are there in society.\nUsually, homophobes are trying to prove it\u0027s as low as 0.5% to make homosexuality sound like an aberration,\nsome totally marginal oddity that can be ignored, laughed at or hated.\nMeanwhile, \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.out.com\/news-opinion\/2016\/3\/11\/less-50-teens-identify-straight-says-new-study\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E some studies go as high as 52%\u003C\/a\u003E!\nThat\u0027s a number that should make every homophobic politician worry about their reelection\nunless they change their hateful policies. Where are such huge discrepancies coming from?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis study treated sexual orientation as a spectrum, and not just gay\/bi\/straight.\n52% is the number of people who say they aren\u0027t 100% straight.\nAlso, it\u0027s among teenagers in the US, which shows that younger people\nin countries where the taboo on homosexuality is lower are more open\nto embrace their queer side and to admit it in a questionnaire.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut let\u0027s come back to that ridiculous figure of 0.03%.\nIf it were true, that would mean there\u0027s only 12 000 queers in Poland\n\u2013 while last year\u0027s \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/paradarownosci\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E Equality Parade\u003C\/a\u003E\ngathered around 50 000 people attending in Warsaw alone.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThat would also make my hometown of Szczecin, population 400k,\na home to just 120 gays, bisexuals, lesbians and trans people.\nAssuming half of them are female and like a third is a proper age\n\u2014 my dating pool would have been just 30 people.\nI probably slept with more than that before I\u0027d moved out of the city.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELooking at my high school class, there were 4 people (out of 28) that I know to be LGBTQ\n(and probably some more that I don\u0027t know about), making it around 14%.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut neither of those methods of trying to estimate this number from my personal experience\nhas even a hint of scientific rigour. Most importantly, the sample sizes are laughably small,\nmaking them not representative at all.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EProper scientific studies, albeit probably pretty reliable, are easily dismissed by homophobes\n\u2013 those surveys were done by some random people they don\u0027t trust,\nthe respondends didn\u0027t have to tell the truth about their orientation, etc. etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut I think I came up with a way to very roughly estimate the number of gay, lesbian and bisexual people\nthat everyone\u003Ca href=\u0022#ftn-1\u0022 id=\u0022ftn-ref-1\u0022\u003E\u003Csup\u003E[1]\u003C\/sup\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\ncan do for themselves and see with their own eyes that there\u0027s a lot of us.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI went on \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.planetromeo.com\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E PlanetRomeo\u003C\/a\u003E,\na very popular gay hookup app that shows you profiles of other guys sorted by distance.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI scrolled down until the 780\u003Csup\u003Eth\u003C\/sup\u003E person until I\u0027ve reached the first person to be \u201c1 km away\u201d.\nThis means that in a circle with the area of \u03c0r\u00b2 = 3.14 km\u00b2 there are at least 780 gays and bisexual guys\n(and probably some girls, and trans people, and couples with a joint account\n\u2013 but those numbers should be neglectable for the purpose of this rough estimation).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u0027s hard to estimate, how many gays in here use this particular app, how many use a different one,\nhow many use multiple, and how many don\u0027t use any... \u2014 so keep in mind that 780 is the lowest estimate.\nIn the radius of 1 km from me there are \u003Cem\u003Eat least\u003C\/em\u003E 780 guys, actively looking for another guy to meet.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think it\u0027s safe to assume that the number of lesbians and bisexual girls would be similar, if not higher\n(studies suggest girls tend to be more bisexual than guys, which makes it a low estimate as well),\nso let\u0027s double our number: there\u0027s at the very least 1560 queer people in the 3.14 km\u00b2 area around me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe population density of the district I live in is 6966 people\/km\u00b2.\nThat means queers are at the very least \u003Ccode\u003E1560 people \/ (3.14 km\u00b2 * 6966 people\/km\u00b2) \u2248 7%\u003C\/code\u003E of the population in here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeven percent! Plus those who aren\u0027t using hookup apps. Plus those who use a different one. Plus the asexual people.\nPlus the aromantic people. Plus trans people. Plus nonbinary people. Plus all the other queers...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know, I know. There\u0027s so many unknowns in my process. But!\nFor the purposes of proving in a \u003Cem\u003Esimple and reproducable\u003C\/em\u003E way\nthat the number of queers is orders of magnitude higher than what some homophobes are claiming\n\u2013 I think this process does a great job, doesn\u0027t it?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI never would have thought that one day I\u0027ll be using hookup apps not to hook up,\nbut to do maths and to fight for human rights \ud83d\ude05\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Chr\/\u003E\u003Cp class=\u0022small\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022#ftn-ref-1\u0022 id=\u0022ftn-1\u0022\u003E\u003Csup\u003E[1]\u003C\/sup\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E Well, ok, not everyone... there\u0027s still a lot of places where queers have to stay so deep in the closet that using apps might not help...\u003Cbr\/\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","tags":["dating","estimation","lgbtq","maths","online dating","statistics","queer","homophobia"],"hasMore":true,"image":"https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_small.png","introLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_big.png\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_mini.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022259.58041958042\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis post is not about gays. It\u0027s about maths.\u003C\/p\u003E","contentLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_big.png\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/romeo-calculator_mini.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022259.58041958042\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis post is not about gays. It\u0027s about maths.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESome guy online told me that queers don\u0027t deserve rights (or at least the attention of lawmakers),\nbecause they make up only 0.03% of the population. Which is ridiculous.\nBoth the argumentation, and the number itself. Human rights are inherent and inviolable,\nhuman dignity doesn\u0027t depend on numbers of specific minoritiesed groups.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut it shows how important it is to properly estimate how many queer people are there in society.\nUsually, homophobes are trying to prove it\u0027s as low as 0.5% to make homosexuality sound like an aberration,\nsome totally marginal oddity that can be ignored, laughed at or hated.\nMeanwhile, \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.out.com\/news-opinion\/2016\/3\/11\/less-50-teens-identify-straight-says-new-study\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E some studies go as high as 52%\u003C\/a\u003E!\nThat\u0027s a number that should make every homophobic politician worry about their reelection\nunless they change their hateful policies. Where are such huge discrepancies coming from?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThis study treated sexual orientation as a spectrum, and not just gay\/bi\/straight.\n52% is the number of people who say they aren\u0027t 100% straight.\nAlso, it\u0027s among teenagers in the US, which shows that younger people\nin countries where the taboo on homosexuality is lower are more open\nto embrace their queer side and to admit it in a questionnaire.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut let\u0027s come back to that ridiculous figure of 0.03%.\nIf it were true, that would mean there\u0027s only 12 000 queers in Poland\n\u2013 while last year\u0027s \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/paradarownosci\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E Equality Parade\u003C\/a\u003E\ngathered around 50 000 people attending in Warsaw alone.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThat would also make my hometown of Szczecin, population 400k,\na home to just 120 gays, bisexuals, lesbians and trans people.\nAssuming half of them are female and like a third is a proper age\n\u2014 my dating pool would have been just 30 people.\nI probably slept with more than that before I\u0027d moved out of the city.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELooking at my high school class, there were 4 people (out of 28) that I know to be LGBTQ\n(and probably some more that I don\u0027t know about), making it around 14%.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut neither of those methods of trying to estimate this number from my personal experience\nhas even a hint of scientific rigour. Most importantly, the sample sizes are laughably small,\nmaking them not representative at all.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EProper scientific studies, albeit probably pretty reliable, are easily dismissed by homophobes\n\u2013 those surveys were done by some random people they don\u0027t trust,\nthe respondends didn\u0027t have to tell the truth about their orientation, etc. etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut I think I came up with a way to very roughly estimate the number of gay, lesbian and bisexual people\nthat everyone\u003Ca href=\u0022#ftn-1\u0022 id=\u0022ftn-ref-1\u0022\u003E\u003Csup\u003E[1]\u003C\/sup\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\ncan do for themselves and see with their own eyes that there\u0027s a lot of us.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI went on \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.planetromeo.com\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E PlanetRomeo\u003C\/a\u003E,\na very popular gay hookup app that shows you profiles of other guys sorted by distance.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI scrolled down until the 780\u003Csup\u003Eth\u003C\/sup\u003E person until I\u0027ve reached the first person to be \u201c1 km away\u201d.\nThis means that in a circle with the area of \u03c0r\u00b2 = 3.14 km\u00b2 there are at least 780 gays and bisexual guys\n(and probably some girls, and trans people, and couples with a joint account\n\u2013 but those numbers should be neglectable for the purpose of this rough estimation).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u0027s hard to estimate, how many gays in here use this particular app, how many use a different one,\nhow many use multiple, and how many don\u0027t use any... \u2014 so keep in mind that 780 is the lowest estimate.\nIn the radius of 1 km from me there are \u003Cem\u003Eat least\u003C\/em\u003E 780 guys, actively looking for another guy to meet.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think it\u0027s safe to assume that the number of lesbians and bisexual girls would be similar, if not higher\n(studies suggest girls tend to be more bisexual than guys, which makes it a low estimate as well),\nso let\u0027s double our number: there\u0027s at the very least 1560 queer people in the 3.14 km\u00b2 area around me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe population density of the district I live in is 6966 people\/km\u00b2.\nThat means queers are at the very least \u003Ccode\u003E1560 people \/ (3.14 km\u00b2 * 6966 people\/km\u00b2) \u2248 7%\u003C\/code\u003E of the population in here.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeven percent! Plus those who aren\u0027t using hookup apps. Plus those who use a different one. Plus the asexual people.\nPlus the aromantic people. Plus trans people. Plus nonbinary people. Plus all the other queers...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know, I know. There\u0027s so many unknowns in my process. But!\nFor the purposes of proving in a \u003Cem\u003Esimple and reproducable\u003C\/em\u003E way\nthat the number of queers is orders of magnitude higher than what some homophobes are claiming\n\u2013 I think this process does a great job, doesn\u0027t it?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI never would have thought that one day I\u0027ll be using hookup apps not to hook up,\nbut to do maths and to fight for human rights \ud83d\ude05\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Chr\/\u003E\u003Cp class=\u0022small\u0022\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022#ftn-ref-1\u0022 id=\u0022ftn-1\u0022\u003E\u003Csup\u003E[1]\u003C\/sup\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E Well, ok, not everyone... there\u0027s still a lot of places where queers have to stay so deep in the closet that using apps might not help...\u003Cbr\/\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E","words":791,"readTime":4,"lang":"en"}}},"blog\/life\/i-love-being-gay":{"key":"blog\/life\/i-love-being-gay","type":"article","published":true,"meta":{"createdAt":"2017-05-10T17:54:09+02:00","publishedAt":"2017-05-12T10:00:00+02:00","group":null,"category":"blog","subcategory":"life","slug":"i-love-being-gay"},"content":{"en":{"slug":"i-love-being-gay","title":"I love being gay!","intro":"\u003Cp\u003EBeing gay is not easy. Depending on where you live, it might mean different things to you. Best case scenario \u2013 some minor inconveniences. Worst case \u2013 even danger of death. \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/lgbtq\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-tag\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E LGBTQ\u003C\/a\u003E youth has a higher suicide rate than their straight \u0026amp; cis friends, they fear getting disowned by their families, thrown out of their homes, in some countries being sentenced to prison or lashes... We don\u2019t have equal rights, we can\u2019t always show affection in public. Being gay can be scary, lonely and awful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut there is also a good side to that. The side of being gay that I really really love!\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","content":"\u003Cp\u003EBeing gay is not easy. Depending on where you live, it might mean different things to you. Best case scenario \u2013 some minor inconveniences. Worst case \u2013 even danger of death. \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/lgbtq\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-tag\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E LGBTQ\u003C\/a\u003E youth has a higher suicide rate than their straight \u0026amp; cis friends, they fear getting disowned by their families, thrown out of their homes, in some countries being sentenced to prison or lashes... We don\u2019t have equal rights, we can\u2019t always show affection in public. Being gay can be scary, lonely and awful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut there is also a good side to that. The side of being gay that I really really love!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EEquality and freedom to be yourself\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen I see a straight couple on a date, most of the time the guy seems nervous: he plans the whole thing, he tries to impress the girl, he bares responsibility for the date to work out well. She, on the other hand, is more passive, just enjoying his efforts.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen I hear about family problems of straight couples, they often concern the division of household chores or generally the traditional gender roles. The wife is expected to sacrifice her career for the children and the household, while the husband is expected to heroically protect the family from every danger.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd almost nobody seems to be happy with that. Girls, who try to impress a guy or want to ask him out, often feel strange, inappropriate. And some guys might be shy and prefer to be approached by a girl, or might not like the burden of organising their dates. Girls might want to focus on their careers, guys might need the privilege of being cowardly...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGays, on the other hand, can be so \u003Cstrong\u003Eflexible\u003C\/strong\u003E in all of that! Who reels up the the other? Well, whoever\u2019s brave enough. Who organises the dates? Whoever feels like it, or whoever has a nice idea, or we just do it together. Who does the chores? We just split it, so that everybody does, what they do best. If both of you are the man or the woman, then you don\u2019t have to \u201cbe the man in this relationship\u201d or wonder \u201cwhat should I do as a woman?\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019m not saying straight couples cannot have such \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/equality\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-tag\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E equality\u003C\/a\u003E and \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/freedom\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-tag\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E freedom\u003C\/a\u003E to be yourself, as same-sex couples do. That would be \u003Cstrong\u003Estereotypical, plain stupid and simply not true\u003C\/strong\u003E. They obviously can, and I know many that do. But you\u2019ve got to admit, the overall trend of equality in a relationship and the general expectations from the society in that matter look way better for same-sex couples, don\u2019t they?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EViews\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EA girl meets a boy: he\u2019s nice, interesting, handsome and strong. She falls in love with him. Well, at least until they talk about politics for the first time. Then it turns out that her prince charming is actually a nationalistic fucktard, he\u2019s hateful towards other nations and skin colours, he wants to let the refugees die in the war zone...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EObviously, \u003Ca href=\u0022\/blog\/how-come-you-don-t-like-a-gay-jew\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-people-carry\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E gays also can be right-wing extremists\u003C\/a\u003E, but statistically I would expect much lower percentage of such people among the LGBTQ community. Why? We can sympathise with \u003Cstrong\u003Eminorities\u003C\/strong\u003E, because we are a minority ourselves. We\u2019ve been hurt by inequality, so we have a lot of determination to fight against it. Our common suffering unites us and makes us stronger.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003ECommunity\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhich brings me to the awesomeness of the LGBTQ community in general. My first time in a gay bar was an amazing, unforgettable experience, even though nothing special actually happened. But it was just \u003Cstrong\u003Eso open\u003C\/strong\u003E!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EObviously, that\u2019s a huge generalisation, but you know... In a gay bar, during a pride parade or in some LGBTQ association, as long as you share the same values, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Efeel welcome\u003C\/strong\u003E, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Ebe yourself\u003C\/strong\u003E and not be judged for that, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Efeel safe\u003C\/strong\u003E and wanted. It\u2019s just so warm and friendly! You can be on first name terms with everybody by default (even in Poland or Germany, where \u201cDu\u201d and \u201cSie\u201d thingy is quite a big deal).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe Community is like a huge, worldwide family for me. I cried after the massacre in \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/orlando\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-tag\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E Orlando\u003C\/a\u003E as if I\u2019d lost really close friends \u2013 even though I didn\u2019t know those people. After my biological family rejected me, it\u2019s the misfits of the LGBTQ community that made me feel at home again.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EOnline dating\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor a shy guy like me online dating is quite a big deal. Remember all the jokes in the sitcoms about couples being ashamed that they\u2019ve met online and coming up with some fake \u201chow we met\u201d stories? This shows a stigma around the topic. As if it was a \u003Cem\u003Eworse\u003C\/em\u003E way to meet someone. If anything, it\u2019s better in many ways. Like being able to get to know someone\u2019s interests and character (and not just their looks) from their profile before even talking to them \u2013 you can\u2019t see any of that when you\u2019re saying hello to a stranger in a bar.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESure, now in the age of Tinder\u2019s popularity, that stigma is getting smaller and smaller. But nevertheless: I\u2019m happy to be part of a community, where meeting your boyfriend or your hookup on the Internet is not a big deal, but practically a default.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003ESex\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEver wondered, why sex-related jokes about gays are almost always about us doing anal (\u201dhaha, they fuck in the shithole!\u201d) or about straight guys\u2019 irrational fears that we would rape them (\u201dI\u2019ll sleep on this side, otherwise you\u2019d fuck me, faggot, hehe...\u201d)? Well, yeah, we do anal, and it\u2019s awesome, what\u2019s your point? And no, gay \u2260 rapist, and if you\u2019d joke about that, it probably means that\u2019s the way you\u2019d treat a woman in a similar situation...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMeanwhile, in sit-coms, standups etc. I keep hearing jokes about guys constantly underperforming in bed, finishing after 3 minutes, refusing to go down on a girl while demanding a blowjob for themselves, being generally boring and self-absorbed in bed... I might think they\u2019re just jokes, but then I keep hearing complaints about precisely that from my straight female friends about their boyfriends.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeems like many straight guys don\u2019t experiment with their bodies, as if their cock was their only sex organ and a woman was basically just a toy for their wank. Getting your nipples stimulated, your armpits or asshole licked, etc. etc., that feels so amazing! Your G-spot is your prostate, and if you don\u2019t play with it for fear that \u201cit\u2019s gay\u201d, you\u2019re just missing out. Licking other people\u2019s bodies can be so hot as well...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFrom what I hear, many straight people divide sex into foreplay and penetration. Penetration is what a guy really wants, while foreplay is what he is willing to do, reluctantly, to be allowed to get to the penetration. And gays? Seriously, I don\u2019t remember the last time I even used the word \u201cforeplay\u201d. It\u2019s all just sex. It\u2019s all awesome. Did you know that most of the time we don\u2019t even fuck in the ass during sex? Anal requires preparation, douching, status talk, condoms, lube, etc., meanwhile everything else is almost just as good, so why bother that much every time?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u201cSeducing a straight guy\u201d is quite a common theme in gay porn. But I don\u2019t really get that phantasy. If the majority of straight guys is really the way standuppers, sitcoms, jokes and their own partners say they are in bed, well... I\u2019m just glad that there are only gay\/bi guys in my bed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EAnd so much more...\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u2019t have to worry about getting someone \u003Cstrong\u003Epregnant\u003C\/strong\u003E. Or about my country trying to restrict access to \u003Cstrong\u003Econtraception and abortion\u003C\/strong\u003E (although \u003Ca href=\u0022\/blog\/schwarzermontag\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-people-carry\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E I am fighting\u003C\/a\u003E for others\u2019 right to use them). I won\u2019t end up in a marriage where we don\u2019t actually want to be together, but we just ended up with an unwanted pregnancy and decided it\u2019s best for the baby... If I share my clothes and underwear with my boyfriend, my wardrobe becomes twice as big. There are so many things I don\u2019t really think about every day, but when they do come up, I can\u2019t help but think \u201cthank goddess I\u2019m gay!\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo if I were born straight, I guess I\u2019d be trying to be as \u201cgay\u201d as possible anyway. Looking for a girlfriend that would treat be like a partner, not as a patriarch. Visiting gay bars, because why not. Using online dating sites and not caring what others think...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere\u2019s naturally \u003Cstrong\u003Enothing wrong with being straight\u003C\/strong\u003E, or with being gay, or lesbian, or bisexual, or pansexual. But hell yeah I\u2019m happy I happened to be born just the way I have!\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","tags":["chores","community","dating","equality","expression","family","freedom","gay","gender","lesbian","lgbtq","online dating","porn","relationship","sex"],"hasMore":true,"image":null,"introLite":"\u003Cp\u003EBeing gay is not easy. Depending on where you live, it might mean different things to you. Best case scenario \u2013 some minor inconveniences. Worst case \u2013 even danger of death. \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/lgbtq\u0022\u003E LGBTQ\u003C\/a\u003E youth has a higher suicide rate than their straight \u0026amp; cis friends, they fear getting disowned by their families, thrown out of their homes, in some countries being sentenced to prison or lashes... We don\u2019t have equal rights, we can\u2019t always show affection in public. Being gay can be scary, lonely and awful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut there is also a good side to that. The side of being gay that I really really love!\u003C\/p\u003E","contentLite":"\u003Cp\u003EBeing gay is not easy. Depending on where you live, it might mean different things to you. Best case scenario \u2013 some minor inconveniences. Worst case \u2013 even danger of death. \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/lgbtq\u0022\u003E LGBTQ\u003C\/a\u003E youth has a higher suicide rate than their straight \u0026amp; cis friends, they fear getting disowned by their families, thrown out of their homes, in some countries being sentenced to prison or lashes... We don\u2019t have equal rights, we can\u2019t always show affection in public. Being gay can be scary, lonely and awful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut there is also a good side to that. The side of being gay that I really really love!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EEquality and freedom to be yourself\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen I see a straight couple on a date, most of the time the guy seems nervous: he plans the whole thing, he tries to impress the girl, he bares responsibility for the date to work out well. She, on the other hand, is more passive, just enjoying his efforts.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhen I hear about family problems of straight couples, they often concern the division of household chores or generally the traditional gender roles. The wife is expected to sacrifice her career for the children and the household, while the husband is expected to heroically protect the family from every danger.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd almost nobody seems to be happy with that. Girls, who try to impress a guy or want to ask him out, often feel strange, inappropriate. And some guys might be shy and prefer to be approached by a girl, or might not like the burden of organising their dates. Girls might want to focus on their careers, guys might need the privilege of being cowardly...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGays, on the other hand, can be so \u003Cstrong\u003Eflexible\u003C\/strong\u003E in all of that! Who reels up the the other? Well, whoever\u2019s brave enough. Who organises the dates? Whoever feels like it, or whoever has a nice idea, or we just do it together. Who does the chores? We just split it, so that everybody does, what they do best. If both of you are the man or the woman, then you don\u2019t have to \u201cbe the man in this relationship\u201d or wonder \u201cwhat should I do as a woman?\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019m not saying straight couples cannot have such \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/equality\u0022\u003E equality\u003C\/a\u003E and \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/freedom\u0022\u003E freedom\u003C\/a\u003E to be yourself, as same-sex couples do. That would be \u003Cstrong\u003Estereotypical, plain stupid and simply not true\u003C\/strong\u003E. They obviously can, and I know many that do. But you\u2019ve got to admit, the overall trend of equality in a relationship and the general expectations from the society in that matter look way better for same-sex couples, don\u2019t they?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EViews\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EA girl meets a boy: he\u2019s nice, interesting, handsome and strong. She falls in love with him. Well, at least until they talk about politics for the first time. Then it turns out that her prince charming is actually a nationalistic fucktard, he\u2019s hateful towards other nations and skin colours, he wants to let the refugees die in the war zone...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EObviously, \u003Ca href=\u0022\/blog\/how-come-you-don-t-like-a-gay-jew.lite\u0022\u003E gays also can be right-wing extremists\u003C\/a\u003E, but statistically I would expect much lower percentage of such people among the LGBTQ community. Why? We can sympathise with \u003Cstrong\u003Eminorities\u003C\/strong\u003E, because we are a minority ourselves. We\u2019ve been hurt by inequality, so we have a lot of determination to fight against it. Our common suffering unites us and makes us stronger.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003ECommunity\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhich brings me to the awesomeness of the LGBTQ community in general. My first time in a gay bar was an amazing, unforgettable experience, even though nothing special actually happened. But it was just \u003Cstrong\u003Eso open\u003C\/strong\u003E!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EObviously, that\u2019s a huge generalisation, but you know... In a gay bar, during a pride parade or in some LGBTQ association, as long as you share the same values, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Efeel welcome\u003C\/strong\u003E, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Ebe yourself\u003C\/strong\u003E and not be judged for that, you can \u003Cstrong\u003Efeel safe\u003C\/strong\u003E and wanted. It\u2019s just so warm and friendly! You can be on first name terms with everybody by default (even in Poland or Germany, where \u201cDu\u201d and \u201cSie\u201d thingy is quite a big deal).\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe Community is like a huge, worldwide family for me. I cried after the massacre in \u003Ca href=\u0022\/tag\/orlando\u0022\u003E Orlando\u003C\/a\u003E as if I\u2019d lost really close friends \u2013 even though I didn\u2019t know those people. After my biological family rejected me, it\u2019s the misfits of the LGBTQ community that made me feel at home again.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EOnline dating\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor a shy guy like me online dating is quite a big deal. Remember all the jokes in the sitcoms about couples being ashamed that they\u2019ve met online and coming up with some fake \u201chow we met\u201d stories? This shows a stigma around the topic. As if it was a \u003Cem\u003Eworse\u003C\/em\u003E way to meet someone. If anything, it\u2019s better in many ways. Like being able to get to know someone\u2019s interests and character (and not just their looks) from their profile before even talking to them \u2013 you can\u2019t see any of that when you\u2019re saying hello to a stranger in a bar.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESure, now in the age of Tinder\u2019s popularity, that stigma is getting smaller and smaller. But nevertheless: I\u2019m happy to be part of a community, where meeting your boyfriend or your hookup on the Internet is not a big deal, but practically a default.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003ESex\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EEver wondered, why sex-related jokes about gays are almost always about us doing anal (\u201dhaha, they fuck in the shithole!\u201d) or about straight guys\u2019 irrational fears that we would rape them (\u201dI\u2019ll sleep on this side, otherwise you\u2019d fuck me, faggot, hehe...\u201d)? Well, yeah, we do anal, and it\u2019s awesome, what\u2019s your point? And no, gay \u2260 rapist, and if you\u2019d joke about that, it probably means that\u2019s the way you\u2019d treat a woman in a similar situation...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMeanwhile, in sit-coms, standups etc. I keep hearing jokes about guys constantly underperforming in bed, finishing after 3 minutes, refusing to go down on a girl while demanding a blowjob for themselves, being generally boring and self-absorbed in bed... I might think they\u2019re just jokes, but then I keep hearing complaints about precisely that from my straight female friends about their boyfriends.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeems like many straight guys don\u2019t experiment with their bodies, as if their cock was their only sex organ and a woman was basically just a toy for their wank. Getting your nipples stimulated, your armpits or asshole licked, etc. etc., that feels so amazing! Your G-spot is your prostate, and if you don\u2019t play with it for fear that \u201cit\u2019s gay\u201d, you\u2019re just missing out. Licking other people\u2019s bodies can be so hot as well...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFrom what I hear, many straight people divide sex into foreplay and penetration. Penetration is what a guy really wants, while foreplay is what he is willing to do, reluctantly, to be allowed to get to the penetration. And gays? Seriously, I don\u2019t remember the last time I even used the word \u201cforeplay\u201d. It\u2019s all just sex. It\u2019s all awesome. Did you know that most of the time we don\u2019t even fuck in the ass during sex? Anal requires preparation, douching, status talk, condoms, lube, etc., meanwhile everything else is almost just as good, so why bother that much every time?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u201cSeducing a straight guy\u201d is quite a common theme in gay porn. But I don\u2019t really get that phantasy. If the majority of straight guys is really the way standuppers, sitcoms, jokes and their own partners say they are in bed, well... I\u2019m just glad that there are only gay\/bi guys in my bed.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Ch3\u003EAnd so much more...\u003C\/h3\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI don\u2019t have to worry about getting someone \u003Cstrong\u003Epregnant\u003C\/strong\u003E. Or about my country trying to restrict access to \u003Cstrong\u003Econtraception and abortion\u003C\/strong\u003E (although \u003Ca href=\u0022\/blog\/schwarzermontag.lite\u0022\u003E I am fighting\u003C\/a\u003E for others\u2019 right to use them). I won\u2019t end up in a marriage where we don\u2019t actually want to be together, but we just ended up with an unwanted pregnancy and decided it\u2019s best for the baby... If I share my clothes and underwear with my boyfriend, my wardrobe becomes twice as big. There are so many things I don\u2019t really think about every day, but when they do come up, I can\u2019t help but think \u201cthank goddess I\u2019m gay!\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo if I were born straight, I guess I\u2019d be trying to be as \u201cgay\u201d as possible anyway. Looking for a girlfriend that would treat be like a partner, not as a patriarch. Visiting gay bars, because why not. Using online dating sites and not caring what others think...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere\u2019s naturally \u003Cstrong\u003Enothing wrong with being straight\u003C\/strong\u003E, or with being gay, or lesbian, or bisexual, or pansexual. But hell yeah I\u2019m happy I happened to be born just the way I have!\u003C\/p\u003E","words":1481,"readTime":6,"lang":"en"}}}}}