{"tag":"compersion","articles":{"blog\/life\/we-should-see-other-people":{"key":"blog\/life\/we-should-see-other-people","type":"article","published":true,"meta":{"createdAt":"2019-11-17T21:19:36+01:00","publishedAt":"2019-12-01T10:56:00+01:00","group":"polyamory","category":"blog","subcategory":"life","slug":"we-should-see-other-people"},"content":{"en":{"slug":"we-should-see-other-people","title":"We should see other people","intro":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_small.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022341.07091172214\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022data:image\/png;base64,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\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_small.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022341.07091172214\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think we should see other people... No, I\u2019m not breaking up with you, quite the opposite.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeeing other people might be beneficial for a relationship. How? Well, let me introduce you to the concepts of \u201cNRE\u201d and \u201ccompersion\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","content":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_big.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022691\u0022 height=\u0022491\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022data:image\/png;base64,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\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_big.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022691\u0022 height=\u0022491\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \u003Cfigcaption\u003E\n                    \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/zadenalove.wordpress.com\/2016\/06\/22\/compersion-jealousy-is-that-really-all-there-is\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\n                        \u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E\n                        zadenalove.wordpress.com\/2016\/06\/22\/compersion-jealousy-is-that-really-all-there-is\n                    \u003C\/a\u003E\n                \u003C\/figcaption\u003E\n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think we should see other people... No, I\u2019m not breaking up with you, quite the opposite.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeeing other people might be beneficial for a relationship. How? Well, let me introduce you to the concepts of \u201cNRE\u201d and \u201ccompersion\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EImagine there\u2019s a situation that makes your partner objectively happy. How do you feel? Happy as well, right? Duh, obviously, you love them, of course you\u2019re happy for them!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut what if this \u201csituation\u201d is the fact that they started being romantically involved with someone else? They still love you, they don\u2019t intend to end things with you, it doesn\u2019t negatively impact your relationship \u2013 they have simply found someone else who \u003Cem\u003Ealso\u003C\/em\u003E makes them happy, that\u2019s all.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHow does it make you feel? If you\u2019re unhappy about it \u2013 that\u2019s jealousy. If you\u2019re happy for them \u2013 that\u2019s \u003Cstrong\u003Ecompersion\u003C\/strong\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf it weren\u2019t for this strange idea, which society feeds us almost every day, that romantic and sexual exclusivity are absolutely necessary for a happy relationship, we would simply treat romance as yet another source of happiness. My partner picked up a new hobby? Great! Found new friends? Awesome! Got a raise? Wonderful! Found a lover? Marvelous!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAccording to a definition from \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.polymatchmaker.com\/main.mvc?Screen=HTML\u0026Page=polyglossary\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E PolyMatchMaker.com\u003C\/a\u003E:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote class=\u0022blockquote ml-4 pl-4 border-left\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003ECompersion\u003C\/strong\u003E \u2013 The opposite of jealousy; the feelings of happiness that your lover(s) are also loving and being loved by other lovers. Coined by the Kerista Commune of San Francisco, which practiced polyfidelity and was disbanded in the early 1990s.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow, for the other thing...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve been in a wonderful relationship for over six years now. It\u2019s plenty of time to build something incredible. For years we\u2019ve been living together, spending most of our time together, we got married, we are each other\u2019s best friends and we can\u2019t imagine our lives without the other.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut six years is also plenty of time to forget what we felt back when we had just started dating. Our love is now stronger and more mature than ever, but that initial euphoric joy of falling in love has obviously faded away by now.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut I\u2019ve met another great guy recently, and he reminded me how it is to feel that. And I know how crazy it might sound to someone who\u2019s monogamous, but dating him actually might have made me a better husband to my husband. He made me remember how I felt when our relationship started. He constantly reminds me to always put my husband first and to always be honest to him. Knowing him makes me discover new things about my primary relationship. He makes me a better person.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd that\u2019s the \u003Cstrong\u003ENew Relationship Energy\u003C\/strong\u003E. Or as \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.polymatchmaker.com\/main.mvc?Screen=HTML\u0026Page=polyglossary\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E PolyMatchMaker.com\u003C\/a\u003E\u2019s defines it:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote class=\u0022blockquote ml-4 pl-4 border-left\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003ENRE \u2013 New Relationship Energy\u003C\/strong\u003E \u2013 That lovely euphoria you experience when you become involved with a new love.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo in short: that\u2019s why I think that we, the people, should see other people.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","tags":["compersion","euphoria","exclusivity","honesty","jealousy","love","monogamy","nre","polyamory","relationship"],"hasMore":true,"image":"https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_small.png","introLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_big.png\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_mini.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022170.53545586107\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think we should see other people... No, I\u2019m not breaking up with you, quite the opposite.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeeing other people might be beneficial for a relationship. How? Well, let me introduce you to the concepts of \u201cNRE\u201d and \u201ccompersion\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E","contentLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_big.png\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/compersion_mini.png\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022170.53545586107\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003Cfigcaption\u003E\n                    \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/zadenalove.wordpress.com\/2016\/06\/22\/compersion-jealousy-is-that-really-all-there-is\/\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csmall\u003Ezadenalove.wordpress.com\/2016\/06\/22\/compersion-jealousy-is-that-really-all-there-is\u003C\/small\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\n                \u003C\/figcaption\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI think we should see other people... No, I\u2019m not breaking up with you, quite the opposite.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESeeing other people might be beneficial for a relationship. How? Well, let me introduce you to the concepts of \u201cNRE\u201d and \u201ccompersion\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EImagine there\u2019s a situation that makes your partner objectively happy. How do you feel? Happy as well, right? Duh, obviously, you love them, of course you\u2019re happy for them!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut what if this \u201csituation\u201d is the fact that they started being romantically involved with someone else? They still love you, they don\u2019t intend to end things with you, it doesn\u2019t negatively impact your relationship \u2013 they have simply found someone else who \u003Cem\u003Ealso\u003C\/em\u003E makes them happy, that\u2019s all.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EHow does it make you feel? If you\u2019re unhappy about it \u2013 that\u2019s jealousy. If you\u2019re happy for them \u2013 that\u2019s \u003Cstrong\u003Ecompersion\u003C\/strong\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf it weren\u2019t for this strange idea, which society feeds us almost every day, that romantic and sexual exclusivity are absolutely necessary for a happy relationship, we would simply treat romance as yet another source of happiness. My partner picked up a new hobby? Great! Found new friends? Awesome! Got a raise? Wonderful! Found a lover? Marvelous!\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAccording to a definition from \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.polymatchmaker.com\/main.mvc?Screen=HTML\u0026Page=polyglossary\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E PolyMatchMaker.com\u003C\/a\u003E:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003ECompersion\u003C\/strong\u003E \u2013 The opposite of jealousy; the feelings of happiness that your lover(s) are also loving and being loved by other lovers. Coined by the Kerista Commune of San Francisco, which practiced polyfidelity and was disbanded in the early 1990s.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow, for the other thing...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve been in a wonderful relationship for over six years now. It\u2019s plenty of time to build something incredible. For years we\u2019ve been living together, spending most of our time together, we got married, we are each other\u2019s best friends and we can\u2019t imagine our lives without the other.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut six years is also plenty of time to forget what we felt back when we had just started dating. Our love is now stronger and more mature than ever, but that initial euphoric joy of falling in love has obviously faded away by now.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBut I\u2019ve met another great guy recently, and he reminded me how it is to feel that. And I know how crazy it might sound to someone who\u2019s monogamous, but dating him actually might have made me a better husband to my husband. He made me remember how I felt when our relationship started. He constantly reminds me to always put my husband first and to always be honest to him. Knowing him makes me discover new things about my primary relationship. He makes me a better person.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd that\u2019s the \u003Cstrong\u003ENew Relationship Energy\u003C\/strong\u003E. Or as \u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.polymatchmaker.com\/main.mvc?Screen=HTML\u0026Page=polyglossary\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E PolyMatchMaker.com\u003C\/a\u003E\u2019s defines it:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cstrong\u003ENRE \u2013 New Relationship Energy\u003C\/strong\u003E \u2013 That lovely euphoria you experience when you become involved with a new love.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo in short: that\u2019s why I think that we, the people, should see other people.\u003C\/p\u003E","words":496,"readTime":2,"lang":"en"}}}}}