{"tag":"childhood","articles":{"blog\/life\/treating-children-like-people":{"key":"blog\/life\/treating-children-like-people","type":"article","published":true,"meta":{"createdAt":"2020-05-23T11:49:32+02:00","publishedAt":"2020-05-23T11:49:32+02:00","group":null,"category":"blog","subcategory":"life","slug":"treating-children-like-people"},"content":{"en":{"slug":"treating-children-like-people","title":"Treating children like people","intro":"\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s plenty of reasons to love Da\u00f0i Freyr\u0027s song\n(and my personal favourite for the 2020 Eurovision win)\n\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E \u201dThink About Things\u201d\u003C\/a\u003E.\nBut the most important reason is this:\nDa\u00f0i is singing about \u003Cem\u003Etreating his child like a human being\u003C\/em\u003E.\nAnd that\u0027s why the song brings me to tears.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","content":"\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s plenty of reasons to love Da\u00f0i Freyr\u0027s song\n(and my personal favourite for the 2020 Eurovision win)\n\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Csvg class=\u0022icon\u0022\u003E\u003Cuse xlink:href=\u0022#light-link\u0022\u003E\u003C\/use\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E \u201dThink About Things\u201d\u003C\/a\u003E.\nBut the most important reason is this:\nDa\u00f0i is singing about \u003Cem\u003Etreating his child like a human being\u003C\/em\u003E.\nAnd that\u0027s why the song brings me to tears.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote class=\u0022blockquote ml-4 pl-4 border-left\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBaby, I can\u0027t wait to know\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nWhat do you think about things\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nBelieve me, I will always be there, so\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nYou can tell me anything and I\u0027ll listen\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou see: my parents were never eager to learn what I think about things. They already knew what I \u003Cem\u003Ehave to\u003C\/em\u003E think.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThey knew I\u0027m gonna be a nice catholic boy that will grow up to love Jesus and marry a woman that they would approve of.\nThey had my whole life planned out for me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EExcept, they didn\u0027t take into account that it\u0027s \u003Cem\u003Emy\u003C\/em\u003E life, not theirs.\nThey ended up with a nonbinary, atheist child who married a man.\nAnd it would\u0027ve been waaaaay easier, both for me and them,\nif they had just accepted the possibility that I won\u0027t grow up to be \u003Cem\u003Ea clone of theirs\u003C\/em\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlmost every bigger problem, every stressful situation, every abusive behaviour of theirs\ncan be traced back to this stupid idea that their goal is not to bring up a person,\nbut to\u2026 well, \u003Cem\u003Eproduce\u003C\/em\u003E more of themselves.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECan you imagine how hard it was to come out as queer to someone who treats it\nas a \u003Cem\u003Epersonal failure\u003C\/em\u003E (and a personal attack) that they didn\u0027t manage to \u003Cem\u003Emake you\u003C\/em\u003E\nexeactly the same orientation as they are?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOtherwise, they weren\u0027t \u201dactively\u201d homophobic.\nThey weren\u0027t saying ugly shit about gay couples on TV or pro-gay politicians, they just didn\u0027t care at all.\nWhen it came to their own child, though?\nRight after coming out I\u0027ve heard that \u201dthose fags should get their balls cut off\u201d from my own father.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThey shamed me for having the second highest grade average in the best high school in the city\n(\u201dwhy not the highest?\u201d), for not having exactly the same skills and interests as they do,\nfor not liking the exact same types of food they do\u2026\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll of that could\u0027ve been avoided, if they just considered me my own person.\nIf I were a stranger, they wouldn\u0027t tell me whom to marry or what to believe in.\nBut, since they gave birth to me, I\u0027m somehow \u003Cem\u003Esupposed to\u003C\/em\u003E be what they want me to.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, though: I won\u0027t be. I\u0027ll be my own self, sooner or later, whether you like it or not.\nThe only thing you can do about it, is make it harder for all of us.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnother fragment of the song that really moves me is this one:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote class=\u0022blockquote ml-4 pl-4 border-left\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThough I know I\u2005love\u2005you\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nI find it\u2005hard to see how you feel\u2005about me\u003Cbr\/\u003E\n\u0027Cause I don\u0027t understand you\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nOh, you are yet to learn how to speak\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDa\u00f0i doesn\u0027t assume that his child loves him.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELove and respect are not a given. You have to build a relationship with someone and earn their respect.\nFew things in the world angry me more than people forcing each other to like other people \u201dbecause it\u0027s family\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, no. Blood ties don\u0027t mean shit on their own.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m way closer to some people unrelated to me than I ever was with anyone of my family. And I\u0027m happy.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat\u0027s very important: it seems like my experience is not an exception, but a rule.\nThink about all those parents who \u003Cem\u003Ehave to\u003C\/em\u003E have a child that becomes a doctor or a lawyer.\nThink about all those fathers who hate their daughters because they \u003Cem\u003Ereally wanted\u003C\/em\u003E a son.\nThing about all those mothers who send their offspring to extracarriculars that they just hate.\nAnd so on, and so forth.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENot even that! Think about all those people who switch to a bizzarly awful \u201dbaby talk\u201d whenever they see a child.\nWhy the hell do they do that? How do they expect the child to learn to speak like a human,\nif they keep exposing them to a caricature of speach?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThink about parents who hate it when their kids call them by name.\nEvery other person close to them just calls them by their name.\nBut if their \u003Cem\u003Echild\u003C\/em\u003E says something other than mom\/mommy\/dad\/daddy\/whatever, they take great offense.\nAs if the kids were inferior to them.\nNot allowed to call them the way that every other human being calls people close to them.\nIsn\u0027t it strange?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cem\u003EYour child is a human being. Treat them as one.\u003C\/em\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOh well, anyways\u2026 Enjoy the song \ud83d\ude09\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022text-center my-4\u0022\u003E\u003Ciframe width=\u0022640\u0022 height=\u0022360\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 frameborder=\u00220\u0022 allowfullscreen\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","tags":["child","minor","parenting","abuse","parents","childhood","queer"],"hasMore":true,"image":null,"introLite":"\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s plenty of reasons to love Da\u00f0i Freyr\u0027s song\n(and my personal favourite for the 2020 Eurovision win)\n\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E \u201dThink About Things\u201d\u003C\/a\u003E.\nBut the most important reason is this:\nDa\u00f0i is singing about \u003Cem\u003Etreating his child like a human being\u003C\/em\u003E.\nAnd that\u0027s why the song brings me to tears.\u003C\/p\u003E","contentLite":"\u003Cp\u003EThere\u0027s plenty of reasons to love Da\u00f0i Freyr\u0027s song\n(and my personal favourite for the 2020 Eurovision win)\n\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E \u201dThink About Things\u201d\u003C\/a\u003E.\nBut the most important reason is this:\nDa\u00f0i is singing about \u003Cem\u003Etreating his child like a human being\u003C\/em\u003E.\nAnd that\u0027s why the song brings me to tears.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EBaby, I can\u0027t wait to know\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nWhat do you think about things\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nBelieve me, I will always be there, so\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nYou can tell me anything and I\u0027ll listen\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYou see: my parents were never eager to learn what I think about things. They already knew what I \u003Cem\u003Ehave to\u003C\/em\u003E think.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThey knew I\u0027m gonna be a nice catholic boy that will grow up to love Jesus and marry a woman that they would approve of.\nThey had my whole life planned out for me.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EExcept, they didn\u0027t take into account that it\u0027s \u003Cem\u003Emy\u003C\/em\u003E life, not theirs.\nThey ended up with a nonbinary, atheist child who married a man.\nAnd it would\u0027ve been waaaaay easier, both for me and them,\nif they had just accepted the possibility that I won\u0027t grow up to be \u003Cem\u003Ea clone of theirs\u003C\/em\u003E.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAlmost every bigger problem, every stressful situation, every abusive behaviour of theirs\ncan be traced back to this stupid idea that their goal is not to bring up a person,\nbut to\u2026 well, \u003Cem\u003Eproduce\u003C\/em\u003E more of themselves.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ECan you imagine how hard it was to come out as queer to someone who treats it\nas a \u003Cem\u003Epersonal failure\u003C\/em\u003E (and a personal attack) that they didn\u0027t manage to \u003Cem\u003Emake you\u003C\/em\u003E\nexeactly the same orientation as they are?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOtherwise, they weren\u0027t \u201dactively\u201d homophobic.\nThey weren\u0027t saying ugly shit about gay couples on TV or pro-gay politicians, they just didn\u0027t care at all.\nWhen it came to their own child, though?\nRight after coming out I\u0027ve heard that \u201dthose fags should get their balls cut off\u201d from my own father.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThey shamed me for having the second highest grade average in the best high school in the city\n(\u201dwhy not the highest?\u201d), for not having exactly the same skills and interests as they do,\nfor not liking the exact same types of food they do\u2026\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAll of that could\u0027ve been avoided, if they just considered me my own person.\nIf I were a stranger, they wouldn\u0027t tell me whom to marry or what to believe in.\nBut, since they gave birth to me, I\u0027m somehow \u003Cem\u003Esupposed to\u003C\/em\u003E be what they want me to.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe thing is, though: I won\u0027t be. I\u0027ll be my own self, sooner or later, whether you like it or not.\nThe only thing you can do about it, is make it harder for all of us.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnother fragment of the song that really moves me is this one:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThough I know I\u2005love\u2005you\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nI find it\u2005hard to see how you feel\u2005about me\u003Cbr\/\u003E\n\u0027Cause I don\u0027t understand you\u003Cbr\/\u003E\nOh, you are yet to learn how to speak\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EDa\u00f0i doesn\u0027t assume that his child loves him.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ELove and respect are not a given. You have to build a relationship with someone and earn their respect.\nFew things in the world angry me more than people forcing each other to like other people \u201dbecause it\u0027s family\u201d.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EYeah, no. Blood ties don\u0027t mean shit on their own.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u0027m way closer to some people unrelated to me than I ever was with anyone of my family. And I\u0027m happy.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EWhat\u0027s very important: it seems like my experience is not an exception, but a rule.\nThink about all those parents who \u003Cem\u003Ehave to\u003C\/em\u003E have a child that becomes a doctor or a lawyer.\nThink about all those fathers who hate their daughters because they \u003Cem\u003Ereally wanted\u003C\/em\u003E a son.\nThing about all those mothers who send their offspring to extracarriculars that they just hate.\nAnd so on, and so forth.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENot even that! Think about all those people who switch to a bizzarly awful \u201dbaby talk\u201d whenever they see a child.\nWhy the hell do they do that? How do they expect the child to learn to speak like a human,\nif they keep exposing them to a caricature of speach?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThink about parents who hate it when their kids call them by name.\nEvery other person close to them just calls them by their name.\nBut if their \u003Cem\u003Echild\u003C\/em\u003E says something other than mom\/mommy\/dad\/daddy\/whatever, they take great offense.\nAs if the kids were inferior to them.\nNot allowed to call them the way that every other human being calls people close to them.\nIsn\u0027t it strange?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cem\u003EYour child is a human being. Treat them as one.\u003C\/em\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOh well, anyways\u2026 Enjoy the song \ud83d\ude09\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003E\u003Cdiv class=\u0022text-center my-4\u0022\u003E\u003Ciframe width=\u0022640\u0022 height=\u0022360\u0022 src=\u0022https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/VFZNvj-HfBU\u0022 frameborder=\u00220\u0022 allowfullscreen\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E\u003C\/div\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E","words":771,"readTime":4,"lang":"en"}}},"blog\/mythology\/atheism-is-freedom":{"key":"blog\/mythology\/atheism-is-freedom","type":"article","published":true,"meta":{"createdAt":"2019-11-21T14:36:41+01:00","publishedAt":"2019-11-23T00:16:00+01:00","group":null,"category":"blog","subcategory":"mythology","slug":"atheism-is-freedom"},"content":{"en":{"slug":"atheism-is-freedom","title":"Atheism is freedom","intro":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_small.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022640.24279210926\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022data:image\/png;base64,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\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_small.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border-bottom\u0022 width=\u0022480\u0022 height=\u0022640.24279210926\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe very first thing I\u2019ve ever tattooed on my body is a symbol of atheism. It might sound stupid for some (\u201cif you don\u2019t believe in god, why do you care so much about the nonexistent?\u201d), but it\u2019s a really important thing for me. Let me tell you why.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","content":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\n                \u003Cnoscript\u003E\n                    \u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_big.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022659\u0022 height=\u0022879\u0022\u003E                \n                \u003C\/noscript\u003E\n                \u003Cspan class=\u0022hide-noscript\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022data:image\/png;base64,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\u0022 data-src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_big.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 class=\u0022border\u0022 width=\u0022659\u0022 height=\u0022879\u0022\u003E\u003C\/span\u003E\n                \n            \u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe very first thing I\u2019ve ever tattooed on my body is a symbol of atheism. It might sound stupid for some (\u201cif you don\u2019t believe in god, why do you care so much about the nonexistent?\u201d), but it\u2019s a really important thing for me. Let me tell you why.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve always been a curious kid. Asking thousands of questions about the world, reading popular science journals, being super diligent at school...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy greatest fear was not understanding things. I was honestly suffering psychologically and emotionally from not being able to wrap my head around some concepts. Having a \u003Cstrong\u003Emental mess\u003C\/strong\u003E in my head was just painful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd there was one issue in particular that was bothering me \u2013 how did the world and humans \u003Cem\u003Eactually\u003C\/em\u003E come into being? At school I was taught about the big bang and about evolution, while at church I was told about a guy who \u003Cem\u003Ejust existed\u003C\/em\u003E and who took six days to \u003Cem\u003Esay things\u003C\/em\u003E and they just \u003Cem\u003Emagically\u003C\/em\u003E appeared. Two equally valid and reasonable hypotheses, right?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor a reasonable adult, of course not! But for a ten-year-old who\u2019s been taught practically from birth to trust their parents and to believe whatever priests says? Who has learned to get on their knees and recite prayers earlier than learning to count? Who\u2019s been indoctrinated practically every day of their childhood?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EParents and catechists seemed not to notice \/ to actively ignore the obvious contradictions between their favourite book and what science \u003Cem\u003Eactually\u003C\/em\u003E knows about the universe. So I had to put my mind at rest by inventing a worldview that would somehow combine both of them: with a god who caused the big bang and then watched over the universe until the Earth formed, who created the first single-cell organism and then watched it evolve into humans... I swear, I\u2019ve never heard of \u201cInteligent Design\u201d at that age. I just went on with whatever made sense under the assumption that no one is \u003Cstrong\u003Elying to me\u003C\/strong\u003E. I didn\u2019t know that was an option.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThen came the teenage years and I can\u2019t even begin to describe what a horror it was to realise that I\u2019m a horny bitch. Not only I had sexual fantasies, not only did I masturbate and liked it, but I also started to think that I might be \u003Cstrong\u003Einto boys\u003C\/strong\u003E more than into girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow I know those are all amazing thing, but back then I was a good catholic boy. And to quote Stephen Fry:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote class=\u0022blockquote ml-4 pl-4 border-left\u0022\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u2019s the strangest thing about this church \u2013 it is obsessed with sex, absolutely obsessed. Now, they will say we, with our permissive society and rude jokes, are obsessed. No. We have a healthy attitude. We like it, it\u2019s fun, it\u2019s jolly; because it\u2019s a primary impulse it can be dangerous and dark and difficult.\nIt\u2019s a bit like food in that respect, only even more exciting. The only people who are obsessed with food are anorexics and the morbidly obese, and that in erotic terms is the Catholic Church in a nutshell.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere wasn\u2019t a week going by in which I wouldn\u2019t hear voices condemning \u201cimpure thoughts\u201d, masturbation, pornography or homosexuality... And the punishment for all of them was the eternal damnation in hell, worse than any suffering you can possibly think of. Can you imagine what damage being in this cult can do to a developing mind?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf the Catholic Church gets you to really believe in their bullshit, you start \u003Cstrong\u003Ehating yourself\u003C\/strong\u003E. Everything you do is potentially a sin. You have to regularly go to a cult guru and tell them all the worst things about yourself. Seriously, what sadist came up with the whole confession thing?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGoing back to slightly more mundane things than psychological damage: religion can take up a lot of your \u003Cstrong\u003Etime\u003C\/strong\u003E. I didn\u2019t just go to a mass every Sunday. I was an altar boy, I was singing in a band, I was learning their bullshit at school, as if those were facts, I was going on pilgrimages, I was praying every day, I was spending a massive chunk of my time trying to reconcile my sexuality and morality with the \u201cmoral\u201d teachings of the Church... There\u2019s so many more useful things I could\u2019ve spent those hours and hours...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOh damn, it was supposed to be just a short note, but it\u2019s already gotten quite long... And I didn\u2019t even start complaining about all the awful and pointless traditions, about facing the catholic homophobia from my own family, about all those matters who didn\u2019t affect me personally but are still shitty, like opposing women\u2019s rights, the Rwanda genocide, pedophilia, anti-condom campaigns, etc. etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know, I know, I\u2019ve been bitching about the Roman Catholicism, not religions in general, but the truth is, they all operate under a similar framework. It can be better (like Protestantism, being less dogmatic and less homophobic), it can be worse (like Islam, threatening death to apostates), but the underlying principle is the same: blind faith is more important than reason, and whatever rules we make up, you have to follow, or else...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u2019s abuse.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGetting out of my cult \u003Cstrong\u003Efelt like escaping a prison\u003C\/strong\u003E. It took me years to get there. But I\u2019m happy now. I\u2019m loving myself. I don\u2019t fear the afterlife. I don\u2019t waste my time on rectum-derived mythologies. I\u2019m not stuck in toxic family relations. I embrace and enjoy my sexuality. I follow the morality based on compassion and reason instead of arbitrary rules and fear of supernatural judgment. I\u2019m finally free to think for myself without worrying about dogmas and blasphemy.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI enjoy my life.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo yeah, that freedom is certainly worth being celebrated in a form of a little \u201cA\u201d on my shoulder.\u003C\/p\u003E\u003Csvg xmlns=\u0022http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\u0022 style=\u0022display: none;\u0022\u003E\u003C\/svg\u003E","tags":["atheism","childhood","curiosity","evolution","homosexuality","indoctrination","inteligent design","masturbation","religion","science"],"hasMore":true,"image":"https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_small.jpg","introLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_big.jpg\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_mini.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022320.12139605463\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe very first thing I\u2019ve ever tattooed on my body is a symbol of atheism. It might sound stupid for some (\u201cif you don\u2019t believe in god, why do you care so much about the nonexistent?\u201d), but it\u2019s a really important thing for me. Let me tell you why.\u003C\/p\u003E","contentLite":"\u003Cfigure\u003E\u003Ca href=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_big.jpg\u0022 target=\u0022_blank\u0022 rel=\u0022noopener\u0022\u003E\u003Cimg src=\u0022https:\/\/avris.it\/image\/atheism-tattoo_mini.jpg\u0022 alt=\u0022\u0022 width=\u0022240\u0022 height=\u0022320.12139605463\u0022 loading=\u0022lazy\u0022\u003E\u003C\/a\u003E\u003C\/figure\u003E\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThe very first thing I\u2019ve ever tattooed on my body is a symbol of atheism. It might sound stupid for some (\u201cif you don\u2019t believe in god, why do you care so much about the nonexistent?\u201d), but it\u2019s a really important thing for me. Let me tell you why.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI\u2019ve always been a curious kid. Asking thousands of questions about the world, reading popular science journals, being super diligent at school...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EMy greatest fear was not understanding things. I was honestly suffering psychologically and emotionally from not being able to wrap my head around some concepts. Having a \u003Cstrong\u003Emental mess\u003C\/strong\u003E in my head was just painful.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EAnd there was one issue in particular that was bothering me \u2013 how did the world and humans \u003Cem\u003Eactually\u003C\/em\u003E come into being? At school I was taught about the big bang and about evolution, while at church I was told about a guy who \u003Cem\u003Ejust existed\u003C\/em\u003E and who took six days to \u003Cem\u003Esay things\u003C\/em\u003E and they just \u003Cem\u003Emagically\u003C\/em\u003E appeared. Two equally valid and reasonable hypotheses, right?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EFor a reasonable adult, of course not! But for a ten-year-old who\u2019s been taught practically from birth to trust their parents and to believe whatever priests says? Who has learned to get on their knees and recite prayers earlier than learning to count? Who\u2019s been indoctrinated practically every day of their childhood?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EParents and catechists seemed not to notice \/ to actively ignore the obvious contradictions between their favourite book and what science \u003Cem\u003Eactually\u003C\/em\u003E knows about the universe. So I had to put my mind at rest by inventing a worldview that would somehow combine both of them: with a god who caused the big bang and then watched over the universe until the Earth formed, who created the first single-cell organism and then watched it evolve into humans... I swear, I\u2019ve never heard of \u201cInteligent Design\u201d at that age. I just went on with whatever made sense under the assumption that no one is \u003Cstrong\u003Elying to me\u003C\/strong\u003E. I didn\u2019t know that was an option.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThen came the teenage years and I can\u2019t even begin to describe what a horror it was to realise that I\u2019m a horny bitch. Not only I had sexual fantasies, not only did I masturbate and liked it, but I also started to think that I might be \u003Cstrong\u003Einto boys\u003C\/strong\u003E more than into girls.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ENow I know those are all amazing thing, but back then I was a good catholic boy. And to quote Stephen Fry:\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cblockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u2019s the strangest thing about this church \u2013 it is obsessed with sex, absolutely obsessed. Now, they will say we, with our permissive society and rude jokes, are obsessed. No. We have a healthy attitude. We like it, it\u2019s fun, it\u2019s jolly; because it\u2019s a primary impulse it can be dangerous and dark and difficult.\nIt\u2019s a bit like food in that respect, only even more exciting. The only people who are obsessed with food are anorexics and the morbidly obese, and that in erotic terms is the Catholic Church in a nutshell.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003C\/blockquote\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EThere wasn\u2019t a week going by in which I wouldn\u2019t hear voices condemning \u201cimpure thoughts\u201d, masturbation, pornography or homosexuality... And the punishment for all of them was the eternal damnation in hell, worse than any suffering you can possibly think of. Can you imagine what damage being in this cult can do to a developing mind?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIf the Catholic Church gets you to really believe in their bullshit, you start \u003Cstrong\u003Ehating yourself\u003C\/strong\u003E. Everything you do is potentially a sin. You have to regularly go to a cult guru and tell them all the worst things about yourself. Seriously, what sadist came up with the whole confession thing?\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGoing back to slightly more mundane things than psychological damage: religion can take up a lot of your \u003Cstrong\u003Etime\u003C\/strong\u003E. I didn\u2019t just go to a mass every Sunday. I was an altar boy, I was singing in a band, I was learning their bullshit at school, as if those were facts, I was going on pilgrimages, I was praying every day, I was spending a massive chunk of my time trying to reconcile my sexuality and morality with the \u201cmoral\u201d teachings of the Church... There\u2019s so many more useful things I could\u2019ve spent those hours and hours...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EOh damn, it was supposed to be just a short note, but it\u2019s already gotten quite long... And I didn\u2019t even start complaining about all the awful and pointless traditions, about facing the catholic homophobia from my own family, about all those matters who didn\u2019t affect me personally but are still shitty, like opposing women\u2019s rights, the Rwanda genocide, pedophilia, anti-condom campaigns, etc. etc.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI know, I know, I\u2019ve been bitching about the Roman Catholicism, not religions in general, but the truth is, they all operate under a similar framework. It can be better (like Protestantism, being less dogmatic and less homophobic), it can be worse (like Islam, threatening death to apostates), but the underlying principle is the same: blind faith is more important than reason, and whatever rules we make up, you have to follow, or else...\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EIt\u2019s abuse.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EGetting out of my cult \u003Cstrong\u003Efelt like escaping a prison\u003C\/strong\u003E. It took me years to get there. But I\u2019m happy now. I\u2019m loving myself. I don\u2019t fear the afterlife. I don\u2019t waste my time on rectum-derived mythologies. I\u2019m not stuck in toxic family relations. I embrace and enjoy my sexuality. I follow the morality based on compassion and reason instead of arbitrary rules and fear of supernatural judgment. I\u2019m finally free to think for myself without worrying about dogmas and blasphemy.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003EI enjoy my life.\u003C\/p\u003E\n\u003Cp\u003ESo yeah, that freedom is certainly worth being celebrated in a form of a little \u201cA\u201d on my shoulder.\u003C\/p\u003E","words":983,"readTime":4,"lang":"en"}}}}}