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Conservatives, get naked!

I’ve recently realised that many conservative catchphrases can be answered with a simple challenge: “get naked then!”. How come?

God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!

Sure, let’s assume he did. But he also created them naked, didn’t he? And he saw that it was very good. If we’re supposed to live our lives according to your ancient fairy tale, why don’t you set an example and remove your clothes?

If you used “Adam and Eve” argument to abuse gay people, chances are you’re a prude that cannot wrap their head around an idea of non-sexual nudity and that would consider it immodest and sinful. But hey, that’s how your god created you! Either that’s what he wants us to wear, or nudity is sinful, chose one!

It’s not natural!

Gay people should not get married, because “what they do is unnatural”? Well, aren’t your clothes either? As well as your laptop, smartphone, washing machine? If you care so much about “being natural” and want to regulate other people’s lives based on your definition of “natural”, why don’t you go natural/naturist first? And Amish, of course...

Isn’t it funny how homosexuality has been discovered in over 500 animal species – and is somehow considered “unnatural”, while we’re the only animal that obsessively covers its genitals – and bigots are fine with that?

That’s sick! Why do you dress up as a woman?

And why do you dress up as a man? Just because you have a penis, you’re supposed to wear pants and a suit, but not a dress or make-up? Where did that logic come from?

If you were born a couple of centuries earlier, you might be wearing high heels and colour pink – and consider that very manly. Seriously, google it.

What we wear depending on our gender is determined by arbitrary social trends, that’s it. It’s a stupid, made-up rule that your bigoted ass tries to present as “universal”, “objective”, “absolute” necessity.

We’re all born naked, and the rest is drag. So either let that trans*/drag person wear whatever the fuck they want to wear, or prove to us your devotion to what’s natural, what we’re born as, what god wants us to be – and get rid of your clothes. Otherwise, you’re just a damn hypocrite.


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